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Yuo wouldn't make a good redneck.Are you adopting? I know a 28 yr old kid lol
I found that but it still doesn't have the "Varmint Poontang" line in it.
Next time you have that problem, try one of these. https://www.amazon.com/Tomcat-Rat-Snap-Trap-1-Pack/dp/B001AZJK46I had a similar wake up call a few months ago. I bought some of the big rat traps after the jokers were laughing at my little mouse traps. I set up three, and checked the next morning and they had eaten the peanut butter off of all of them. So I got more PB and mixed in some flour to make it more solid, then tied a string lightly around the peanut-butter ball so if they pulled it, it'd trip the trap. I heard a very satisfying SNAP, scratch, scratch scratch around 3am. I checked when I got up and there was a nice sized momma rat about 12" overall (5-6" body and 6-7" tail) with a very flat head. I caught the only baby the next morning. The scratching and digging stopped.
I live next to a few corn fields. The farmers had spread chicken poop on them before planting, and had apparently scooped up a bunch of rats in the process. We caught about a dozen in our barn.