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UPS dogs
- Thread starter Fatal_Bert
- Start date
And 0 dogs were shot......
my dog goes ape **** when the brown van shows up.
Same here. The driver usually stands in the front yard for a minute gathering his nerve.
That is a interesting observation.And 0 dogs were shot......
our dogs also freak out anytime they see the brown truck but not in defense. our local driver always has a big thing of dog treats with them and give them out to any dog they see and our dogs are very aware of this now and understand ups = treats! hell we've had problems getting them to stay OUT of the truck they get so excited now.
Great Facebook posts, the driver in newburg Oregon should write a book. He is very funny
Prison time is hard time.
Prison is fences. Prison is gates. Prison is orange jumpsuits, bad food, and days spent marking time on the yard.
While I am a firm believer in law and order, I am also a sucker for a sob story. Which is why for some time I have made it a point to stop every day and ease the suffering of this poor, forlorn inmate by offering her a biscuit and listening to her plaintive howls and mournful cries of the hard life she endures on “the inside” as an innocent victim who took the rap for a crime she didn’t commit and is now paying the price for a justice system that is utterly broken.
Her sad tale of woe is enough to bring a tear to the eye of even the most heartless cynic. The thin, watery gruel that passes for her nourishment; the total lack of comfort or shelter from the rain and cold; and the endless boredom and monotony that she endures in a life completely devoid of any comfort, love or affection would make even the stingiest driver reach deep into the biscuit box in order to ease her suffering.
But, shockingly, not all is as it seems. To the sharp eyed and observant delivery man, there are some “discrepancies”in her account that have caused me to question the sincerity of her story.
We begin with the watery, inadequate gruel that she claims she must subsist on. If that is the case, then who is being fed the generous quantities of premium-quality dog food that her humans regularly order and that are being delivered on a weekly basis by none other than yours truly? And how has she been able to maintain her plump tummy and sleek, healthy fur on a diet lacking in essential nutrients?
We then turn to her claims of lack of shelter and exposure to the elements. Upon the covered porch she stays on during the day sits another suspicious item I that I delivered; a deluxe sized, fleece-lined dog pillow with a telltale power cord plugged into an outlet. Why is it plugged in? Who is it for? Could it be that -gasp- she has somehow neglected to mention the inconvenient truth that the cold, hard boards she claims to have to lie upon actually have an electrically heated dog bed sitting on top of them?
We then examine the issue of her humiliating orange prison attire, and her desolate life of boredom, loneliness and despair. I have a very clear memory of delivering an orange, down-filled, rain-proof dog jacket, as well as numerous chew toys, fetching sticks, and sleeves of tennis balls to her address. Who were they for? And to add even more suspicion, there was also that occasion when I happened to be working late and drove down her road at the exact moment that the humans she claims are so neglectful of her were home from work and playing tug-of-war in the yard with a brown Labrador that looked so much like her that it could have been her twin!
Once confronted with these facts, the sordid truth emerges; I have been dealing not with a convict, but with a con *artist* who has played upon my sympathies in order to extract generous amounts of biscuits from me with the all the skill of a concert violinist. There is a sucker born every minute all right...and that sucker is me!
By Scott Hodges in Newberg, Oregon
#crymeariver
#liarliarpantsonfire
#fooledagain
#Imasuckerforagirlwithaprettyface
Prison time is hard time.
Prison is fences. Prison is gates. Prison is orange jumpsuits, bad food, and days spent marking time on the yard.
While I am a firm believer in law and order, I am also a sucker for a sob story. Which is why for some time I have made it a point to stop every day and ease the suffering of this poor, forlorn inmate by offering her a biscuit and listening to her plaintive howls and mournful cries of the hard life she endures on “the inside” as an innocent victim who took the rap for a crime she didn’t commit and is now paying the price for a justice system that is utterly broken.
Her sad tale of woe is enough to bring a tear to the eye of even the most heartless cynic. The thin, watery gruel that passes for her nourishment; the total lack of comfort or shelter from the rain and cold; and the endless boredom and monotony that she endures in a life completely devoid of any comfort, love or affection would make even the stingiest driver reach deep into the biscuit box in order to ease her suffering.
But, shockingly, not all is as it seems. To the sharp eyed and observant delivery man, there are some “discrepancies”in her account that have caused me to question the sincerity of her story.
We begin with the watery, inadequate gruel that she claims she must subsist on. If that is the case, then who is being fed the generous quantities of premium-quality dog food that her humans regularly order and that are being delivered on a weekly basis by none other than yours truly? And how has she been able to maintain her plump tummy and sleek, healthy fur on a diet lacking in essential nutrients?
We then turn to her claims of lack of shelter and exposure to the elements. Upon the covered porch she stays on during the day sits another suspicious item I that I delivered; a deluxe sized, fleece-lined dog pillow with a telltale power cord plugged into an outlet. Why is it plugged in? Who is it for? Could it be that -gasp- she has somehow neglected to mention the inconvenient truth that the cold, hard boards she claims to have to lie upon actually have an electrically heated dog bed sitting on top of them?
We then examine the issue of her humiliating orange prison attire, and her desolate life of boredom, loneliness and despair. I have a very clear memory of delivering an orange, down-filled, rain-proof dog jacket, as well as numerous chew toys, fetching sticks, and sleeves of tennis balls to her address. Who were they for? And to add even more suspicion, there was also that occasion when I happened to be working late and drove down her road at the exact moment that the humans she claims are so neglectful of her were home from work and playing tug-of-war in the yard with a brown Labrador that looked so much like her that it could have been her twin!
Once confronted with these facts, the sordid truth emerges; I have been dealing not with a convict, but with a con *artist* who has played upon my sympathies in order to extract generous amounts of biscuits from me with the all the skill of a concert violinist. There is a sucker born every minute all right...and that sucker is me!
By Scott Hodges in Newberg, Oregon
#crymeariver
#liarliarpantsonfire
#fooledagain
#Imasuckerforagirlwithaprettyface
Some UPS drivers won't deliver to my house my two boxers are out, the dogs will run to the backyard when deliveries come and just bark, never approaching anybody, except the one mailman, he's friendly to them. lol
I'm amazed by how many people wet their pants when they see a large dog. I took my larger Boxer to Home Depot, which I have done many times, and I just got done letting some father take pics of his small kids with my dog, then the manager approached me and asked us to leave because somebody, from across the store, was scared and complained.
Here's a USPS lady delivery this morning, pulled up, chucked the packages, and drove off, lol.
I'm amazed by how many people wet their pants when they see a large dog. I took my larger Boxer to Home Depot, which I have done many times, and I just got done letting some father take pics of his small kids with my dog, then the manager approached me and asked us to leave because somebody, from across the store, was scared and complained.
Here's a USPS lady delivery this morning, pulled up, chucked the packages, and drove off, lol.
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