MrStoic

Born into a militant society where physical perfection is required, and all the deformed, retarded, and democratic babies are thrown from a cliff, I faced hardship from birth. Having received combat training as a child, I was forced from the militia at the age of six to live and survive with nothing but my wits, brute strength, AR 15, and a spork. After returning victorious from my exile, having slain a leprosy ridden armadillo and fashioned it into a hat, I was immediately crowned king of the Red Bone community and have lived my life since guarding it from all threats, such as; commies, democrats, (I know, its redundant.) and American Idol.

Born into a militant society where physical perfection is required, and all the deformed, retarded, and democratic babies are thrown from a cliff, I faced hardship from birth. Having received combat training as a child, I was forced from the militia at the age of six to live and survive with nothing but my wits, brute strength, AR 15, and a spork. After returning victorious from my exile, having slain a leprosy ridden armadillo and fashioned it into a hat, I was immediately crowned king of the Red Bone community and have lived my life since guarding it from all threats, such as; commies, democrats, (I know, its redundant.) and American Idol.