My cadence slowed down with my 365xl, but not so much that I question carrying it. Smaller frame and lighter weight will see the felt recoil more anyway.
I’d say take a look at the 43x or 48 over the 43. Add a Shield Arms S15 magazine or two and you’re running 16 rounds In your carry. I have all three, 43x, 48, and 365xl. I tend to carry my 365 more but still get down with my 43x and 48. Hope that helps. I know you’d be better with the 43 or 365...
I've always been a Glock guy, and still am (don't start throwing stones folks). However, I picked up the 365xl NRA edition with the Romeo Zero at a good price and have barely carried another EDC. Super comfortable, easy to conceal, great to shoot...I can go on.