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Okay I'm sure this will be taken wrong by some but I'm going to try it anyway.
I was having a conversation today with a coworker and he said he "was" an alcoholic. Sounds like it peaked during covid. He still occasionally drinks, but very lightly. He likes higher end Bourbons and will make a shot last 2 hours. Hasn't been intoxicated in three or so years. He has also turned into a fitness nut the last year and a half or two and has physically totally transformed. Has zero desire to drink to excess.
But it struck me, you never hear people say they "were" an alcoholic. Even if they haven't had a drop in decades. They almost always say I "am" an alcoholic.
There was a time in my life, long, long ago, where I drank way too much and too frequently. A distinctly remember the thought, "this isn't good" and pulled way back. I'm only a very light social drinker today. I go months without a drop if there's no occasion that warrants it. But I could see how it can get out of hand for people and definitely become a habit.
This is probably unfair, but it seems to me saying I "am" an alcoholic is defeatist. It's telling yourself you are not in control. It's not giving yourself credit for beating it.
Don't misunderstand, if alcohol was ever a problem for you I would never encourage anyone to test themselves if they felt they'd lapse. Everybody is different. But what is wrong with saying "I was an alcoholic and I choose to no longer drink."?
I never hear people say I'm addicted to smoking if they haven't smoked in 20 years. They generally say I'm an ex- smoker. Even if they follow it with "I still crave them."

I was having a conversation today with a coworker and he said he "was" an alcoholic. Sounds like it peaked during covid. He still occasionally drinks, but very lightly. He likes higher end Bourbons and will make a shot last 2 hours. Hasn't been intoxicated in three or so years. He has also turned into a fitness nut the last year and a half or two and has physically totally transformed. Has zero desire to drink to excess.
But it struck me, you never hear people say they "were" an alcoholic. Even if they haven't had a drop in decades. They almost always say I "am" an alcoholic.
There was a time in my life, long, long ago, where I drank way too much and too frequently. A distinctly remember the thought, "this isn't good" and pulled way back. I'm only a very light social drinker today. I go months without a drop if there's no occasion that warrants it. But I could see how it can get out of hand for people and definitely become a habit.
This is probably unfair, but it seems to me saying I "am" an alcoholic is defeatist. It's telling yourself you are not in control. It's not giving yourself credit for beating it.
Don't misunderstand, if alcohol was ever a problem for you I would never encourage anyone to test themselves if they felt they'd lapse. Everybody is different. But what is wrong with saying "I was an alcoholic and I choose to no longer drink."?
I never hear people say I'm addicted to smoking if they haven't smoked in 20 years. They generally say I'm an ex- smoker. Even if they follow it with "I still crave them."
