the hard part isn't saying it..the hard part is get warm and comfortable on the garage floor.lolTelling the wife to... "Get in the kitchen and make me a sammich". Wait, I have a hard time even saying that sober.
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Things that are hard to say when you are drunk
- Thread starter BIKER13
- Start date
Evnin' Ociffer!
I’m sotaly tober
Okay, I agree with most of 'em. However, there is one exception. At a much younger age, lo these many years ago, I was pulled over, well not exactly pulled over....I'll start over:
I was in Birmingham, AL when it started to snow, and I thought it'd be great to go to a bar on Southside and hangout. It actually snowed a few inches and the roads became "impassable" for Alabama drivers. But I, I, was on my bicycle. And after a few too many I decided I'd better get home before the roads were impassable to me. I was almost home when a police car pulled up beside me on the empty road and the officer rolled down his window and was probably about to ask me "what the (insert expletive here) are you doing." He'd apparently been following me for a while and at first thought that I was weaving back and forth all over the road just to have fun in the snow.
But! Before he could ask what I was doing, I inquired, "Hello, ossifer, it'n't a lovely day?"
I'm sure he figured I was toast, but pulling in a college kid for BUI (biking under the influence) was not high on his agenda on that white winter afternoon. So he just asked how much farther I had to go, and when I weavingly replied, while pointing, "toooo, to, two blocks!" he told me to be careful and proceeded on his way, police cruiser slipping along the road, weaving not as much as I was.
So, you can almost say at least one of those last items when you are inebriated.
I was in Birmingham, AL when it started to snow, and I thought it'd be great to go to a bar on Southside and hangout. It actually snowed a few inches and the roads became "impassable" for Alabama drivers. But I, I, was on my bicycle. And after a few too many I decided I'd better get home before the roads were impassable to me. I was almost home when a police car pulled up beside me on the empty road and the officer rolled down his window and was probably about to ask me "what the (insert expletive here) are you doing." He'd apparently been following me for a while and at first thought that I was weaving back and forth all over the road just to have fun in the snow.
But! Before he could ask what I was doing, I inquired, "Hello, ossifer, it'n't a lovely day?"
I'm sure he figured I was toast, but pulling in a college kid for BUI (biking under the influence) was not high on his agenda on that white winter afternoon. So he just asked how much farther I had to go, and when I weavingly replied, while pointing, "toooo, to, two blocks!" he told me to be careful and proceeded on his way, police cruiser slipping along the road, weaving not as much as I was.
So, you can almost say at least one of those last items when you are inebriated.
I was making a left hand turn and saw the blue lights, I kept going forward and hit a split rail fence.Cop yelled "What the hell are you on?" I said." a motorcycle sir." we laughed and laughed and he gave me a ticket for illegal left turn,sure glad he didnt look in that yellow flashlight on the seat with a bungee.
"Take me drunk i'm home"
