Question for the physics majors

[Mrs_Esterhouse]

Foreground:
I had 6 India Pale Ales and 1 dozen hottest wings available. (UNKNOWN in schoville units/irrelevant)
Equation:
To contain liquid cohesion let's assume that my anus measures >1mm in diameter at a semi constant rate. Discount breathing and squatting for a constant state.
If I spray a consistent stream of IPA and chicken wing at a constant rate of 1 quart/2 second ratio with a 75/25 liquid solid ratio and solids at an average of ~20mm per unit. What is the e expansion rate on my anus? Given that there is no known acceleration/deceleration inconsistent on the flow?

I have a number, my opponent has a number, but we're sure the math isn't all there.

Please give an example to express the unincluded math to help me win my argument.
Due by noon on Sunday

Edit:
I do realize that I threw empirical and metric units in there so substitute 1000ml for 1qt for continuity

It adds up to 9mm blowing the lungs right out.

 

[JoKeR50]

Foreground:
I had 6 India Pale Ales and 1 dozen hottest wings available. (UNKNOWN in schoville units/irrelevant)
Equation:
To contain liquid cohesion let's assume that my anus measures >1mm in diameter at a semi constant rate. Discount breathing and squatting for a constant state.
If I spray a consistent stream of IPA and chicken wing at a constant rate of 1 quart/2 second ratio with a 75/25 liquid solid ratio and solids at an average of ~20mm per unit. What is the e expansion rate on my anus? Given that there is no known acceleration/deceleration inconsistent on the flow?

I have a number, my opponent has a number, but we're sure the math isn't all there.

Please give an example to express the unincluded math to help me win my argument.
Due by noon on Sunday

Edit:
I do realize that I threw empirical and metric units in there so substitute 1000ml for 1qt for continuity

Wait, are you in a vacuum? Is this at sea level? What is the temperature? What phase is the moon in? come on, you have to give us at least the most basic parameter...

 

[Nonliberal]

Wait, are you in a vacuum? Is this at sea level? What is the temperature? What phase is the moon in? come on, you have to give us at least the most basic parameter...

Assume sea level, 14.7 psi ,75f , astronomy is not my strong suit, call it x1 for variables

 

[Nonliberal]

It adds up to 9mm blowing the lungs right out.

I've breathed and strained through a couple like I was having a baby in my life. To the edge of consciousness once or twice. Almost had a stroke so kind of like blowing a lung out. Never had a hemorrhoid before. Got that iron butthole. I have heard many a horror story about the hemorrhoids.

My average defecate is almost perfectly cylindrical like a bat handle and has no more odor than a fresh baked biscuit

 

[rnation]

simple country boy answer to your equation is. You went into Dukes fartin in a thimble and you came out $hittin in a 5 gallon bucket. and gonna progress into $hittin thru a screen door .

 

[Baldilox]

I'm about to blow one out laughing so hard at this damn thread at 2:30am!!

 

[7pt62THOR]

.....and now I want chicken wings!

Enjoy your "movement" Nonliberal !

 

[Horsehat]

I think at any duration beyond 3 seconds, given the corrosive quality of the detritus and the high rate of flow, you have to consider erosion as part of the equation.

 

[Just1more]

Irrelevant, but they were boneless and heavy battered but well soaked. Excellent actually.
Duke's Calhoun, Ga 5 stars, do recommend

Well since you disclosed you were eating said wings at an establishment, did you bother to check out their bathroom? You can always tell by the condition (appearance and aroma) as to how quickly these stomach bombs will work.

 

[Triptones]

I would say the hell with the equation and have fun with it!