Bigfoot is really an Oar fish that has evolved over the centuries and learned to walk upright replacing his scales with hair in order to blend in with poluted waterways during the de-escalation of his species. The two that washed up were learning how to walk upright in order to get on shore and sign up for Obamacare when they collapsed from mercury poisoning that had washed out to sea from the California Gold Rush era. They were scheduled to be picked up by a UFO from Area 51 that inadvertedly got off course while checking out an armed unmaned drone from DHS that was in route to the Mexican Border to attack Al Quada soldiers crossing the border disguised as more Oar Fish. This whole incident will be documented in a Disney movie called the "Circle of Life". If you don't believe me, I read this on WikiLeaks!