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Skeptics stunned by video of ‘Bigfoot’ in Mississippi woods: ‘Best footage ever recorded’

Why is Bigfoot always a male!? How come no big hairy cans swinging as it/ she is careening through the woods?
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I was camping alone one time and Bigfoot came sat next to the fire with me, drank one of my beers and told me no one will ever believe me before walking back in the woods.
I don't believe you. Everyone who's spent any time with Sasquatch / Bigfoot knows he only drinks whiskey and always plays a game of chess with humans. Then the unicorn shows up and everyone touches the magic horn and no one gets a hangover. That's been printed, so it must be true.
 
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