VENTRILOQUISM

[kimchee45]

VENTRILOQUISM

Let's go through some basic ventriloquism.

What ? Why did you say that ? Who gives a Rat's a.. ?

Whoa, Slow down Pardner, gimme a chance here, willya ?


Now pretend you are in a group meeting and your boss says something so stupid it causes you to gag.
But since you know ventriloquism, you can insult your boss and blame your worst enema sitting beside you.

Let's start with the basics.

Always leave your lips slightly open, AND they must not move !

If you want to say, "Kiss my a$$",
You pronounce "Kiss NYE A$$"

Lips did not move did they ?

Now, more complicated ... Kick him while he is down :
"I Thucked yer old lady" !

Then, quickly turn and glare at your nemesis as if HE said it !

A brief alphabetic list of "Labial" sounds and their substitutes ...
B use D
F use eth
M use N
P use T
V use D
W use 'duggle u to prounounce the letter, but most words using W can be prounounced without using your lips.

Always keep a 'dead pan' expression and use glares to blame your opponent.

Those are the basics, just practice, practice, practice. Have fun.
Oh, if you are entertaining a child, raise your voice real high to imitate her doll talking to her.

 

[Fear Itself]

Alright, I'll bight. I know you gave your age at 75 in another thread. How long you been retired from the carnival? Ha-just kidding. I am curious how long you've had this talent. Also, can you throw your voice?

 

[kimchee45]

Alright, I'll bight. I know you gave your age at 75 in another thread. How long you been retired from the carnival? Ha-just kidding. I am curious how long you've had this talent. Also, can you throw your voice?

Oh, I am afraid of fear . I'm off to my safe place ... . . . .. . OK, HOT DOG, I AM in my safe place now. (My typing might suffer, as I have trouble reaching the keyboard from under the desk.)

A disclaimer, or several ... I have never Worked a carnival.
I spent six years in the Navy, worked as an hourly employee at Chrysler, while I carried 12 to 14 hours of Engineering classes at Purdue, and commuted over 100 miles per day. I have three college degrees, but that is just through very hard work ! Believe me !
I then taught Engineering College Courses for three years, then hired on as a Production Engineer at GM, where I worked for 30 years.

The Ventriloquism, I just reasoned out, a simple engineering problem.
Try it. I think you will be able to make it work. Practice in front of a mirror. Kids love it. Adults, not so much.

I also do very credible impressions of some of the Old time folk. John Wayne, Johnny Cash, Gabby Hayes, Slim Pickens, Pat Butram and a few others.

There! See. I am not Just a doofus, I am an experienced doofus.

I do hope this helps resolve the confusion some of you have about some dork that appears out of nowhere and and says weird things. I can always blame er, "The Voices". yeah, the Voices told me to do that.

Ok. I can see by the expression on your face, that you ain't buyin it. Whatever.
All of the above is true, except for the voices. I throw that in now and then just to jar folk out of their complacency.

A true tale from work ...

The last few years of my career, I was forced to work an onerous Midnight 12 hour shift, as Management was trying to encourage me to retire as my pay was higher than my boss' pay.
Another Engineer and I were getting ready to go home when we stopped to visit a day engineer who came in early. we chatted a bit, and then got into a silly argument, about something silly ? What else.
Anyway after a while, he was getting the best of me. And all this was in a huge room with perhaps 100 -200 desks separated into cubicles. And there was just the 3 of us there.
I suddenly stopped and looked up the left to an empty space and said loudly WHAT ?, I looked puzzled and said What ? again. Then looked back to my victim and told him, "The Voices are telling me to come over there and slap you !" "But I'm not going to do it." The victim had backed his chair up to the wall, and the other guy damned near died laughing.

See ? I am normal.

 

[WyldeDime]

For a guy with three degrees, you have the weirdest writing style.

 

[kimchee45]

Alright, I'll bight. I know you gave your age at 75 in another thread. How long you been retired from the carnival? Ha-just kidding. I am curious how long you've had this talent. Also, can you throw your voice?

Shiite. I forgot. Throwing your Voice ...

Voice direction is difficult to perform when dealing face to face. All Normal people have 'Stereo' hearing. Over a microphone it is easier.
Distraction is one technique, have something else moving, near you, and a person's 'Lying Eyes' might trick them into believing. Also, use voice tone, volume, and inflection.
Projecting at a distance, lower your volume. Holding a 'hillary' puppet raise the tone to a screech, and wince away from it.

I have babbled enough for now, Good luck.

 

[canoecanoe]

Sounds like a pile of fermented Korean vegetables to me.

 

[Fear Itself]

I had an old hand me down Howdy Doody and used to put on shows for my little sister and her friends. I'm not convinced I was that good but they seemed to enjoy it. My friend had the doll with the top hat and tux. We even had a couple of marionettes that we would use. Big times to be had by all! My youngest is 17 and he thinks I led the most boring childhood in the 60s and 70s.

 

[kimchee45]

For a guy with three degrees, you have the weirdest writing style.

Nanner, nanner, nanner, Yeah, but I always got an "A" on every essay I submitted.

Yeah, I know, I did not use that style then.

 

[kimchee45]

Sounds like a pile of fermented Korean vegetables to me.

Oh, you rotter. :-)

 

[kimchee45]

I had an old hand me down Howdy Doody and used to put on shows for my little sister and her friends. I'm not convinced I was that good but they seemed to enjoy it. My friend had the doll with the top hat and tux. We even had a couple of marionettes that we would use. Big times to be had by all! My youngest is 17 and he thinks I led the most boring childhood in the 60s and 70s.

yeah. been there. done that.