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Anybody ever buried a parent and felt like the world was lifted off your shoulders

Gimmebackmybullets

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The Hen that laid the Golden Legos
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I did .
Saturday.
We were at odds for 30 years.
Worked for the man the best years of my young life.
When he realized he couldn't control my thinking anymore to his benefit,he had no use for me.
Yet for 10 years I still tried to please the man.

He had me locked up once for beating my brothers ass in a fight my brother started.
I Never respected the man after that day.
And it never botherd him.
He sat in an electric wheelchair while my mom worked 50 years at a major company while he went into local politics, pissed every one in the world off in the town we reside in, that he married into, squandered a legacy away,that my mother's family worked hard to build, yet he didn't care about anyone but himself.
Am I going to be judged in the afterlife for the way I feel about my biological sperm doner?

At this point I will take my chances.
A dear friend of mine traveled from Florida the next morning after I contacted her to be with me and my mom in this trying time .

She knew the things I just revealed, and a whole lot more.
She brought to my attention that only 2 people at that funeral home was there for my dad.
The other 2000 folks were there to see my mother .
Don't know why I felt the need to share this story.
But just remember before you judge someone, until you walk in their shoes, just give folks the benefit of the doubt where it applies.
I'm not asking for nothing.
But I realized a lot about the way the world works in the last 72 hrs that I had never thought about before.
I can count the true friends I have in this world in less than 10 fingers.
It's a rude awakening, when you have to bury a family member to convince yourself that some things you can't control in life, no matter how hard you try or how good a raising you had.
My Grandfather on my mom's side was the best example of what was expected of a man in my lifetime.
When he died I wasn't mature enough to realize that.
But the older I get, the more I see what I learned from that man that I didn't even realize I learned.
I just needed to vent.
Thanks for your time.
 
Sorry for your loss. My Dad and I haven't had the best relationship either. All you can do is try to do as right by them as you can. I think that our fathers did make us tough. And that goes a long way. Take this knowledge and treat your children accordingly. My in laws were more supportive, loving and fair than my family ever was. I think yours may be the same. I can tell you my Dad's family had it rough. And I'm sure that's why he is the way he is. Make peace with it. Hopefully you and your Mom have a good relationship.
 
Have always loved and protected my mother, even though she was blind of all the evil he brought to the situation.
She stood by him thick and thin.
I've made peace with myself 10 years ago and always pushed myself to Excell in raising my own kids.
And never made a difference in my kids.
I saw their strengths and weaknesses and pushed them to respect themselves and their strengths.
They have made me very proud.
They have also admitted they had no use for my father as well
All this time I thought I'd hid my scars to them.
But they saw all of it.
This was a surprise, yet it instilled in me that I'd done my job as a parent , for them to know how to read people.
We talking a 33 year old daughter and a 22 year old son.
My daughter is a degreed school teacher.
And bless her heart, she is just like me.
I guess I don't understand how a parent can not hope for the absolute best life has to offer for a child that they put on this earth.
I never felt that growing up except from my mother and Grandfather.
I'm very blessed to have the kids I have.
 
Have always loved and protected my mother, even though she was blind of all the evil he brought to the situation.
She stood by him thick and thin.
I've made peace with myself 10 years ago and always pushed myself to Excell in raising my own kids.
And never made a difference in my kids.
I saw their strengths and weaknesses and pushed them to respect themselves and their strengths.
They have made me very proud.
They have also admitted they had no use for my father as well
All this time I thought I'd hid my scars to them.
But they saw all of it.
This was a surprise, yet it instilled in me that I'd done my job as a parent , for them to know how to read people.
We talking a 33 year old daughter and a 22 year old son.
My daughter is a degreed school teacher.
And bless her heart, she is just like me.
I guess I don't understand how a parent can not hope for the absolute best life has to offer for a child that they put on this earth.
I never felt that growing up except from my mother and Grandfather.
I'm very blessed to have the kids I have.
Sir, throughout you took care of your mother. And, you did your best by you father. You have done well, and have a family you deeply care for. God bless you and your loved ones.
 
First off, sorry for your loss. Thru my life there have been many mud puddles down the road of life. Some easy to step around, a few I have had to swim through. I have learned from those puddles and found I wouldn't change any. Honestly
most I had no control over. If any had changed I might not be where I am today. My lovely wife had a biological father she stopped communicating with, a man I really didnt know. He left her mother and herself at her mom's parents place to
come back to Georgia to get a divorce and then marry her Mom's best friend. Anyway, asked if I could write him and did.
I thanked him for being and making the choices he did. I feel I wouldnt be married to his youngest daughter had he made
different choices. Also said it was a shame he didnt know his daughter better, in my eyes the most awesome woman I know.
Am not sure he ever read the letter, have a feeling his wife tore it up. Have a good day.
 
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