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Looking for the best martial arts for discipline and self defense for my daughter and then son

Thanks for all the info, I was leaning towards leaving Magra as it is no holds barred for the most part. But, I didn’t think it would teach them discipline at the same time. If I am wrong let me know. Thanks for the wrestling tips as I did it in high school. As most altercations ended up with a few punches or kicks and then it turns to more of wrestling and ground and pound in what I have seen in my life experience. My kids are 12yr old daughter and 10 yr old son, and eventually after the groundwork is laid down years down the road I would like them to train with a.n ex spec ops guy. As I forsee societal collapse coming in the next 20 years as we have a number of ways it can happen.
 
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