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Revolver for mom

The one other thing to remember is that a snub nosed revolver is an experts gun. If your Mom can't or won't put in the time with it, it's pretty unlikely she'll be able to hit anything with it even if she can handle the double-action trigger... no matter what the distance.
 
Another thing about racking the slide.

Most inexperienced shooters will try to pinch the slide and rack it like a slingshot.
Have her hold the gun close and parallel to her body. Pushing with her dominant hand and pulling with her support. Using this method I've seen frail old women rack slides on Glock, Smiths, FNs, etc.

Give that a shot and see if that changes anything.
That method or any other doesn't work, she has arthritis. She can't rack a slide on a semi-auto, it's got be a revolver with a light short trigger
 
Why would she ever need to rack the slide???? That is done by the caring son. Show her how to operate the safety.

People who are recommending a Beretta, oh please!!!! She might as well be trying to pull a trigger on a DAO revolver.
 
Although I think the best bet is a polymer-framed compact 380 (uses weaker springs than a 9mm) with a "safe action" trigger system, IF YOU INSIST ON A REVOLVER...

... consider encouraging her to shoot it single-action. With practice, people can get really good at thumb-cocking a revolver and shooting rapid-fire.

This is what my mother did in her 70s and early 80s, when she could not quickly and reliably deal with the DA trigger on even a butter-smooth S&W K-frame with the mainspring turned down to the minimum pressure to pop the primers in DA mode. She learned to single-action the thing.

So, since she wasn't going to be using it in DA mode anymore anyway, I got her a Charter Arms .357 Bulldog with a skinny 6" barrel and mounted a laser sight on the barrel. (This was for home defense and to travel with when she was driving alone, not on-body carry). The gun was pretty light (only 5 shot cylinder), but the laser unit added some front-end weight to tame recoil. Although it was a .357, we only used .38's in it, sometimes +P's but sometimes not. With 148 grain wadcutters it was a pleasure to shoot at the range.
 
You don't think that single-action revolver shooting is fast enough?
Check out this guy, a cowboy action shooter with the nickname "Lead Dispencer."
Notice he's not fanning the hammer, or pointing. He's AIMING and hitting the steel plates.

A video from Ruger about single-action revolvers for self-defense:
 
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